With a marathon, there’s always two sides to the story! (➡️)
4 of the hardest months I’ve ever been through, and it all came to the fore today. It’s been 4 months since my mum died (+1 day) shortly and unexpectedly, just after Christmas. So everything has always been really up in the air. Training has been difficult to say the least.
Once an outlet for me to battle mental issues or search for clarity, soon became overwhelming and my mind would fill with negative thoughts. I just feel I’ve been carrying so much emotional baggage that at times, it’s felt unbearable.
I wanted to try my best today and do her proud. Enjoy the moment. Enjoy the day, as seen by the first picture, my eyes light up when I see my family! They make everything sparkle ✨
It didn’t quite work out for whatever reason after mile 17. Things just sort of went off the cliff, but before that it was going to plan. In fact, I’d say better than expected. So just finishing after battling all of the emotions, is just as special to me. It’s hard to say whether I was fit enough or if got things wrong. Who knows.
Seeing my family though, who’ve helped me through the darkest/hardest moments, know how much today meant to me. They know the right things to do and say. Even if I’ve been a royal pain the ass these past few months ♥️
So it’s going to take some time to see the positives from today, and I’m okay with that. Right now I’m sitting here with a stinking cold, feeling a tad frustrated/sad/overwhelmed/tired. And just wishing I could celebrate today with her too.
Me and Newport have some unfinished business!
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